I am so grateful to be married to Brian! He is such a good husband and father. Here are some reasons I am so grateful for him and love him:
-he holds the priesthood and is willing to use it
-he believes in me
-he supports me and gives me strength
-he works hard to take care of his family.
-he sings Emma to sleep
-he plays games with Emma
-he is the best snuggle buddy
-has faith in our loving Heavenly Father
-helps around the house
-makes me laugh... Every day
- makes me feel beautiful
-knows when I am in need of a pick me up and surprises me with one
-knows what to say to make me feel better
-loves Disney
-dreams big
These are just a few of the many reasons! I am just so in love! That's all :)
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
Thursday, June 7, 2012
Thoughts from an emotional mom
So I haven't written in two years... And honestly I am slightly disappointed. I have always been one to compare myself... I have never been the most confident of people and never feel good enough. I see my friends have these amazing blogs sharing stories and pictures from their family and I feel like I am not interesting enough. I want so badly to be one of those moms... You know the ones who blogs I may or may not stalk where everything seems so perfect... Their house is spotless, their kids sleep through the night, dinner is always ready for their husband (and it's more than just a bowl of Mac and cheese), they don't struggle financially and everything seems so perfect! I know their life isn't perfect but from the view they are giving this outsider looking in it sure seems that way...
Lately I have been sooo baby hungry! I long to have another baby so bad! I love being pregnant and feeling the baby inside of me. I want Emma to have a little brother or sister. I want to be a mom... A mom to more than one kid. Brian and I talk about this almost daily (which frustrates him) he says now isn't time... He is just getting established in his new job and a few months ago I graduated from a dental assisting program and am looking for a job... If I found a job soon and we got pregnant in the fall by the time the baby came I would have a year experience before the baby was born.
Well I am on the pill (which is not my favorite but I had to get the iud out due to cysts) one day I got every pregnancy symptom hard. At first I thought it was just the pill but everyone put ideas in my head that I was pregnant so I got my hopes up. When my period started I was so upset. I cried and cried. It doesn't help that everyone I know is pregnant and my two friends who both have daughters Emma's age are expecting their second child.
Then I realized how selfish I was! I have a beautiful family... My daughter was not only healthy but smart, beautiful, loving, funny, and perfect! How did I get to this point? A few things helped:
The first was reading an inspirational memoir called, "Heaven is Here". I highly recommend everyone read this book! She went through difficult trials and kept faith and tried to stay positive. A quote that touched me was "Life wasn't perfect but even with its flaws it was wonderful."
My life isn't perfect, I can't stay home with my baby, I am not pregnant with our second, our house isn't the cleanest, money is tight, emma doesn't sleep and our baby has a chipped tooth yet my life is pretty wonderful!
The second thing that helped was reading my friend's blog about her trying for years to have a baby but not being able to and her struggles with infertility. I may not be pregnant now but I was able to get pregnant with Emma. I alway said my ovaries were selfish with not Releasing eggs and making huge painful cysts instead but I have realized they are really just stubborn. I am grateful I had my baby.
The last thing was reading my best friend's little sister's blog... She lost her baby girl at 21 weeks due to a rare chromosome imbalance. She was induced knowing she was going to give birth to her already dead baby. Her faith is incredible and my heart breaks for her. I am so grateful that my daughter was born healthy (minus needing to be under billi lights a few days and reflux) but I got to hear her laugh, cry and coo. I got to feed her, rock her to sleep and raise her.
So I maybe so baby hungry but I need to just count my blessings. Life is hard. Life isn't perfect. Life isn't what I would have wanted it to be. But life is wonderful and beautiful!
"When we encounter challenges and problems in our lives, it is often difficult for us to focus on our blessings. However, if we reach deep enough and look hard enough, we will be able to feel and recognize just how much we have been given." - Thomas S. Monson
Lately I have been sooo baby hungry! I long to have another baby so bad! I love being pregnant and feeling the baby inside of me. I want Emma to have a little brother or sister. I want to be a mom... A mom to more than one kid. Brian and I talk about this almost daily (which frustrates him) he says now isn't time... He is just getting established in his new job and a few months ago I graduated from a dental assisting program and am looking for a job... If I found a job soon and we got pregnant in the fall by the time the baby came I would have a year experience before the baby was born.
Well I am on the pill (which is not my favorite but I had to get the iud out due to cysts) one day I got every pregnancy symptom hard. At first I thought it was just the pill but everyone put ideas in my head that I was pregnant so I got my hopes up. When my period started I was so upset. I cried and cried. It doesn't help that everyone I know is pregnant and my two friends who both have daughters Emma's age are expecting their second child.
Then I realized how selfish I was! I have a beautiful family... My daughter was not only healthy but smart, beautiful, loving, funny, and perfect! How did I get to this point? A few things helped:
The first was reading an inspirational memoir called, "Heaven is Here". I highly recommend everyone read this book! She went through difficult trials and kept faith and tried to stay positive. A quote that touched me was "Life wasn't perfect but even with its flaws it was wonderful."
My life isn't perfect, I can't stay home with my baby, I am not pregnant with our second, our house isn't the cleanest, money is tight, emma doesn't sleep and our baby has a chipped tooth yet my life is pretty wonderful!
The second thing that helped was reading my friend's blog about her trying for years to have a baby but not being able to and her struggles with infertility. I may not be pregnant now but I was able to get pregnant with Emma. I alway said my ovaries were selfish with not Releasing eggs and making huge painful cysts instead but I have realized they are really just stubborn. I am grateful I had my baby.
The last thing was reading my best friend's little sister's blog... She lost her baby girl at 21 weeks due to a rare chromosome imbalance. She was induced knowing she was going to give birth to her already dead baby. Her faith is incredible and my heart breaks for her. I am so grateful that my daughter was born healthy (minus needing to be under billi lights a few days and reflux) but I got to hear her laugh, cry and coo. I got to feed her, rock her to sleep and raise her.
So I maybe so baby hungry but I need to just count my blessings. Life is hard. Life isn't perfect. Life isn't what I would have wanted it to be. But life is wonderful and beautiful!
"When we encounter challenges and problems in our lives, it is often difficult for us to focus on our blessings. However, if we reach deep enough and look hard enough, we will be able to feel and recognize just how much we have been given." - Thomas S. Monson
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